I Don't Miss You Dad...

Dear ''dad''

I don't miss you. It's been seven months since you walked out that door with no explanation. You just walked out. I waited up the next morning with your coffee in your favourite cup, I waited by the window like every morning expecting you to come home from work...but you never did. I was 19 when you left but my age didn't matter. It still hurt me. You promised me you'd never leave me but you broke that promise.

For the past seven months you haven't done anything with me except Christmas day when I spent an hour with you before you kicked me out and sent me back home. You kept my brothers there with you though. You let them stay longer not me though. You just picked me up and dropped me. I wanna know why. But you won't even speak to me. You won't even look at me if you see me in the street. To me you've died...but you're not even dead.

My biological dad didn't want me and now you don't want me either. When my friends and people at college spoke about their fathers for presentations I just sat there, I didn't know what to say. What explanation to give because you didn't even give me one.

I thought you might have come back until you got engaged to someone four years older than me. I thought maybe just maybe you would walk through that door and make everything okay again. I wouldn't be the only one looking after mum anymore and you would help out...but you didn't.

When mum got sick you didn't have help with college/school money you left me to struggle to find anything to feed your kids with. You left me to look after my sick mother, your wife, while you were off with your ''girlfriend''

I remember on my 20th birthday mum was better, the boys were at school and people on your side of the family sent me cards. But they didn't come into the house, they sent them through the mail even though they live six doors away...I didn't even get a message from you, nothing. I was turning 20 dad and you raised me from when I was six.

You didn't get to meet the two guys that broke my heart in two. You always said if someone broke my heart you'd break their face but you didn't. You didn't even know that when this happened I was depressed and worried about everything.

Your new daughter is lucky. She's going to get to grow up with a dad, not like me, I'm just going to have the thought of you. I never got to message you because you blocked me. I just want to know why dad. Is it because I'm weird? Because I failed school? Why is it just me your singling out? You told me you loved me but if you did you wouldn't have left.

I don't miss you dad, I never will, I'll never need you dad.