Loving the Bi-polar Man

Being head over heels in love is a roller coaster in its own right, loving a person that suffers from bi polar disorder is like riding a roller coaster that has flown off the hinges and is just rolling through the amusement park. You get all of it , some times its wonderful and full of adventure, other times it confusing and when the ride is over it almost always ends in devastation.
Your bipolar man has many faces. In the begining he can be extremely charming, he cant take his eyes off you. He sneaks you off every chance he gets. And when you two are in between the sheets it is mind blowing sessions that you only hear about in movies. Then out of no where, he will not touch you and becomes very cold and distant. This hot/cold behavior leaves you wondering what did you do wrong now?
The first time you experience a manic or hypo-manic episodes (manic but more controlled and less extreme) is so much fun. You think, this guy is talkative, upbeat and full of energy, what is there not to love about this man? The next week the depression that effects them physically, spiritually and soulfully sets in and there is nothing you can do to help him. You end up confused and scared because you don't know how to deal with it.
Once he gets comfortable in the relationship you, start to see the controlling behavior set in.At first glance it just seems like he is being talkative and outgoing but it soon turns to being manipulative behavior He cant predict your behavior so now he is learning to control you in every way he can. The controlling statements often have a small blow to your self esteem. You hear things like "only a dumb person" or "what you are thinking makes no sense". when he sees that this is not helping sway your mood or your behaviorto his liking, he will pull away from you. If you cant meet his need of being in control he will disconnect.
Almost always there is a drug or alcohol problem somewhere through out their life. This combined with the ability to spend unbelievable amounts of money on whatever they want leads to long binges of drinking or partying. You will find receipts for large amounts of alcohol. You will see him drink past the point of puking and he won't stop till he is piss on the bed drunk. Or see evidence of large drug binges. And you will find yourself asking could he have really bought all that? The answer is yes!
During mania or hypo-mania, someone with bipolar disorder can find all sorts of reasons to rationalize spending money on whatever they deem necessary. If he has
a family that loves him around they usually will control most of his finances for this reason.
He also can go through bouts of uncontrollable irritability , sadly you will often be the outlet for the anger , but so can children, and other family members. At the same time he is also experiencing thoughts of grandeur. He may think that it is his job to take care of people or that he can plan out how world events are going to play out. He will always feel like he is more talented that you are.
Try to remember that he is suffering from bipolar disorder does not directly control most of these behaviors. They are influenced by the balance or imbalance of chemicals in their brain.
If you stick around through the madness you will find a kind loving man under it all. You can have boundaries that help you navigate the murky waters of this illness. Communication is almost always the key. You have to remember that the anger and the isolation come from his confusion of trying to understand your emotions, your mood.
So I have found that when we state exactly what we want from a situation we get better results than when we don't leave room for guessing anything. I have to monitor his medication and his sleeping, But other than that we have a pretty good relationship.