"Depression can feel like you're drowning within yourself...and then you can't breathe..."

I first discovered I had depression when i was staring at a blank wall, unable to respond to my mother, I felt emotionally numb, scared; disorientated. Mental illness is defined as the diminished capacity to cope with every day life: that was definitely my experience. I could. not. cope. being on medication was not something I choose, like my fate. I was in for a rough ride of horrible adverse side-effects from new medication that I had never taken before (like so many other people experience). Of course, medication is not the only means of help people can go for, you can seek professional advise: never suffer in silence. I knew I had depression and I needed medication, which was a decision me and my mother made; calculated. We weighed up the pros and cons, like horrible side effects, potential withdrawal, she didn't want me to become a zombie; misconception. I felt like I was drowning. I did not know what do do, I was drowning in an endless sea of dispair, self-neglect and darkness. Depression can feel like you're drowning within yourself...and then eventually you can't breathe...

The symptoms of depression:

- depressed mood.
- reduced interest or pleasure in activities previously enjoyed, loss of sexual desire.
- unintentional weight loss (without dieting) or low appetite.
- insomnia (difficulty sleeping) or hypersomnia (excessive sleeping)
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What is depression?

Depression is a serious mental illness in which feelings of sadness and loss of interest last for weeks and interfere with daily life. All people experience moments when they feel sad or blue, but these feelings usually pass within a couple of days and are not indicative of depression.Depression can cause deep emotional pain both to the person experiencing it and, often, to that person's close family and friends.

Types of Depression

There are several different types of medically recognized depression.

The most common type of depression is called major depression, and it occurs when your symptoms interfere with your enjoyment of life or daily functions — including your work, sleep, and eating habits — for at least two weeks straight.

Some people experience only one episode of major depression in their life, while others may go through numerous episodes of the illness.

In comparison, people with another condition known as persistent depressive disorder — also known as dysthymia — experience less severe mood symptoms that last continuously for at least two years.

During this time, there may also be periods when the person experiences major depression.

Other common types of depression include:

Postpartum depression, in which mothers experience symptoms of major depression after giving birth (mood impairment is much stronger, and lasts longer, than the "baby blues" that many new mothers experience)
There is also Seasonal affective disorder (SAD), in which depression sets in during winter (and sometimes fall) and is associated with a lack of sunlight. it s something I tend to experience when it isn't sunny, i.e miserable weather.

Psychotic depression, in which severe depression is paired with some form of psychosis, such as delusions and hallucinations
Premenstrual dysphoric disorder, in which symptoms of depression develop a week before a woman's period and pass after menstruation. Some people who experience depression may have bipolar disorder — formerly called manic-depression illness — which is characterized by moods that cycle between extreme highs (mania) and lows (depression).

Lastly, there is major depression which I have suffered from for about 5 years since my parents divorce. Following that was traumatic stress disorder which can come hand in hand with depression. The symptoms of PTSD include insomnia, night sweats, palpitations, increased heart rate. And lastly my own symptoms of Major depression which I and so many people experience are: Self-neglect, crying, self-harm, insomnia, alcohol & substance abuse, inability to cope with everyday life, sadness, melancholy; psychosis.

Types of anti-depressant medication which is issued by a doctor to treat depression.

Citalopram (Celexa)
Escitalopram (Lexapro, Cipralex)
Paroxetine (Paxil, Seroxat)
Fluoxetine (Prozac)
Fluvoxamine (Luvox)
Sertraline (Zoloft, Lustral)

If you are suffering from depression there are many fields of help:

- NHS
- Centres like MAP west team if you are in London
- The samaritans
- The quakers
- Helplines
- Consulting
- Consulting your general practictian
- Prescription medication for mental ailments
- Familial support
- Friend support

By Nyisha Hv