SEBASTIAN

Main Connections Photos Articles Send message Block user

Name

RUEL BONGANCISO

Gender

Male

Location

Cadiz City, Negros Occidental, Philippines

7 photos

SEBASTIAN › New article
8 years ago

October 6, 2012, 4:22 am, Bedroom. Langga ko, never in my weirdest dreams that God will put me in this situation – meeting you and feeling this way. Everything happens for a reason, they say. This could be proved as a test to myself for maybe I am stronger than I imagine I am. This old boy had been through a lot and I’d been telling myself that I am invisible as long as I am alive. I probably am coz this isn’t a plain situation, in fact this is a very complicated one. Lots happened to me in the past but never did I asked God the stupid question – “Why me Lord?”. And right until now, I won’t ask the good Lord. He has plans I know and I am willing to lay it all unto Him, all trusting in the works of his hands. I believe loving you is His work. How will I tackle all these I know He will help me through. In the past I tried to smooth things on in my own, now I’ll let Him do the work of making things right for I realized He is above me.

Had there been no God, I will never fall in-love with you… why? Cos if I’m the only way who is in control of myself, I will see to it to fall for someone who can love me back, even more that I could have. But there is no denying, there is a greater force than I am and I found myself in a pit as magical as this. They say it’s absurd but I just laughed it out. This is amazing. Feels like I found myself in a wonderland and found myself in awe for all the possibilities in this world far out from my imagination. Yes, you can’t relate langga ko because layu ka gd sa akon kag wla pa gd kita ka bonding. But, isn’t it some kind of a magic? It just feels so good to capture the feelings again and again. They said (my friends) that I ain’t in my lucid thoughts lately. But I am and I found the extraordinariness of this yet I never gave it a bad name. Just like one Rockstar said “ shot through the heart, you’re to blame… You give love a Bad Name… “ but no I won’t though I will be shot through my head and heart over and over again.

They said love is the enemy, Stephen King once wrote it. He said that love is the old slaughterer, that it is not blind, that it is a cannibal with extremely acute vision. He said Love is Insectile; it is always hungry… it eats friendships… but no, no matter how I admire his works I don’t agree with him because I believe and I feel it now that love is the source of life, it gives breath, it opens the beauty of the world that is sometimes enveloped in the shadows of past bitter experience. It renews fading dreams, it keeps shattered pieces whole again.I am in-love with you langga ko, though I know that you are far to reach out. I am so madly in love with you. How much more if you’re just around?…How much more if we could just see each other in just a split second. but destiny is so playful, destiny puts us in two places where we could not easy hold hands together, destiny situate us in a place where the only connection is only our phones. How will I know the veracity of your love langga ko if things would always be like this? You might say that I am too ambitious because I fell in love with you though we don’t have formal introduction. (laughs..) I know langga ko that all of these are just your trip or worst these are just part of your life as a PolSci student. Making reasons, debating on issues, arguing on the ideas which are unfathomable. But langga, this is LOVE, my LOVE, this is a gift, which could not be proven by a simple research or argumentation. Yes I know, at the end, I would lose the battle, the battle of love between you and me. It’s not my fault langga ko, it’s Gods plan, and I don’t want to twist it because I don’t want to fail in His eyes.October 17, 2013 – Terrace - I have been asking, why YOU of all the people. and why me? I don’t know. It just happened. Maybe because we both love compact powders, lipsticks, mascaras, you appreciate beauty; (LAUGHs) maybe because of your wit, yes that’s one. Maybe because you are so kind, maybe because you appreciate women wearing thongs … I don’t know… Might be because of your appearance wherein I was exactly shot by Cupid’s arrow. Might also because of how you dress, so cool, so right in everything, so crisp and clean. Or maybe it’s the way you text messaged me, so true and so fluent… (laughs)… or maybe I fell in love with you just because of the truth that I can’t have you.

Some hate fire that’s why they keep themselves away from troubling situation. Fire is pain, it burns. I pity them… Langga ko, never did they realize that not all the time fire burns. They never saw how fire made things shine and glow. They never saw how fire absorbs the cold. They never saw how embers protect the campers’ sleep all in the wild. You are my fire, you made me shine. You made me glow. Your embers secures me in my sleep. Your warmth kept me away from the killing cold. Too bad for them, they never saw all These…

Langga ko, its very late na gd ni ya but I don’t have yet the eagerness to close my eyes as you used to know me, (Early bed always) (laughs) I am still thinking of the moment that you were here at my side, hoping that it will come again. I am still thinking on the kisses and hugs that we both enjoy (I don’t know if you really enjoy with my company) . The way you fight me in bed, so angry, so cruel yet so smooth and appealing.

What really made an old boy fall for you? For me, Physical matters are nice but intelligence and passion born of living, the ability to move and be moved by the subtleties of mind and spirit are what really counts. .. and that’s what you are langga ko… People say.. “ruel, think!” but analysis destroys whole, some things like this are meant to stay whole.. some things, magic things like this are meant to stay whole. If I’ll try to look at their pieces, they’ll go away. You are magic langga ko and I don’t wanna do that, I don’t want you GONE. Langga ko when magic comes to you, grab it. Bathe yourself with it and that time you will somehow be able to relate with what I feel now. God, I’m a child again and it feels so Good. Fairytales don’t come true langga, but magic comes when you’ll never know. Feel it, don’t let it slip in your fingers…

You are so loved. langga ko 11:52 PM

Cancel

8 years

LiaF7 › One thing I agree with your friends... a person in love is in a different level and is not totally lucid. Passion can blind you and your mind just wants you to see what your heart sees. The "in love" state can make you forget that 20 other people are in a room when you are accompanied by the one you love. The rest of the world can turn blurred and your focus is on one single person.

8 years

SEBASTIAN › New article
8 years ago

Understanding the young with their sentiments takes a lot of effort and courage. It gives you head aches and pain but sometimes it gives you a smile when you know how to ride with their mental feeling no matter how rude it is and no matter how painful it may be.

Shrek is one of my favorite characters in the movie - obviously the title is SHREK AND THE beanstalk? (Laughs..) Well, seriously in my childhood moment I was not replete with a lot of cartoon characters in my mind (Since living in a far flung barangay without electricity and of course TV will not give you a single moment about Tigress, Winnie the Poo, Yoda, Cinderella, and of course SHREK and a lot more) but because I tried to watch cartoons when I became a city mouse so I have already the idea and knowledge about these stuffs. Take note, my most fav character today which I am longing to have this stuff in my bed is Mike Wazowski - opps you know what I mean.. My birthday will be this coming November 17. No! I am just kidding. I am fond of TAZ actually.. you can include this in wrapped box. (Laughss... ) Wait! I've lost you already. All I have to say here is that Shrek is one of my fave cartoon characters.

It happened after I bid goodbye to my Grade VII English when this intelligent little cute boy in my Class whom I am very fond of, asked me if I know about SHREK... oh Shrek? I have this in my mind that there is something so special on the questions he asked me. Before I answered him, I had to think deeper even in a short moment of time and presto! I answered him.. Yes I know Shrek, he is my father. And I went out from the classroom and he shouted to let me come again to classroom in the afternoon because he got some thing for me. I said "OKAY"...

Puzzled and bewildered, I keep on analyzing what is his real intention of asking about you-know-what-i-mean. I tried to analyze but I stopped because I know that if I have to analyze, the whole thing will be scattered and it will be broken down into pieces. I stop to analyze to make the whole thing as it is - COMPLETE. So, I worked with my stuff in my table which I enjoyed it very much - accomplishing this and that in preparation for Parent's Meeting in the afternoon.
Enjoying with the personal things in my table, I noticed that the boy I'v said above was in front of me walking snugly and effortlessly with his not-yet-cured injured leg. He invited me to go back to their room to see something he prepared for me. I went with him knowing to please him since he really exerted more strength just to reach me in my table (I was to happy to see him walking since that's the first time that he walks out from their room). When we reached our classroom (so messy classroom) I noticed that some of his classmates had been laughing a lot. I gave them my warmest smile and proceeded to our bulletin board where he ushered me to, and I saw one of his classmates covering the middle part of the bulletin board with his black and so-used bag. I slid his bag and I saw these with my picture.

Arrrrrrrgggghhhh...!!!!
I felt so dismayed but I took control of my emotion. Instead of getting mad with them I laughed with them and I said "thank you for the gift and this is the best gift I ever received this year" (not in a sarcastic way). I unglued all the pictures and hold them in my hand as if I am so happy holding them (while my mind is telling me to tear them into pieces) and went back to the faculty room and pasted all the pictures inside the left wall of my drawer (if you wanted to see them, they're still there) and laugh a lot for I've noticed that the pictures have identical smiles.. (laughs..) There I realized that probably because of my Shrek smile, He/they made fond of my picture. Anyway, they were happy about it then so be it. all I have to do is to make them happy.
Bonus!
Every time I open my drawer, it makes me smile because I've got a good shrek smile inside it. This will remind me everyday that I have to start my day with smile.

Sometimes, there are things that you feel bad about, most especially if you are thinking that somebody are making a practical joke about you.Yet, if you just see what is the good side of these bad things, you will really feel happy about it. What is the most important thing to realize is how you deal this stuff calmly and youthfully.

Accepting jokes from my students is accepting what is the real me. I might have the shrek smile but I have this real and authentic smile. Shrek is innocent, true and I am too..
(hahaha palusot nalang)...

Cancel

7 years

Natasha › Wonderful article...?

7 years

SEBASTIAN › New article
8 years ago

June 19, 2011, 4:37 am. bedroom at Pacific Tourist Inn, Cebu City.

I lost you when I was 5 year old, I never experienced sleeping in your lap and listening to your song. I grew up without you and I wrangled life all by myself. I wasn't able to experienced your kisses and hugs. All I could remember is your big and long belt which left traces in my delicate young skin everytime I stumbled and committed mistakes. You saw me crying for the pain I received, begging you to stop flagellating me with your belt. you saw me hiding while sobbing inside our large family wardrobe. I could even vividly remember how you fought with mama, and how you forced mama out of our thatched house and how we cried to beg you to let mama stay. These but all I could remember. These might be nasty but I know you have reasons why you did all these to me.

Sometimes I could not help myself but envy people with their father beside them. I saw and I see their fathers fighting for them when they met troubles in school. I saw and see fathers walking, playing and laughing with their kids at park. I saw and see fathers escorting their sons and daughters receiving medals and diplomas in school. Their proud father is always with them in all of their endeavors.

Though I have bitterness, I still continue to fight and struggle for my future. I studied fervently and worked hard to achieve my dreams and ambitions. I never let my bitterness impede my plans, because I know God is and will always be with me through the years of my life.

Sometimes I question why are there children walking in the ashes of deceitfulness when their fathers are with them all the time. Why are there children involved in heinous crime, locked up in a cell and found their place out there? Is their father defective in giving them pieces of advice or are they categorically nonconformist? They have their father but they went out of the righteousness. I don't have my father but I am in a right track - modesty aside.

Papa, I keep singing these lines "When I and my mother would disagree To get my way I would run from her to him He'd make me laugh just to comfort me(yeah, yeah) Then finally make me do just what my momma said"

Later that night, when I was asleep He left a dollar under my sheet Never dreamed that he would be gone from me"pretending that I had you as a supper loving papa. Nothing I could do, but to sing and pretend.

Now and again, I ask myself also, why I sometime get attracted to men. Is it because I long to see a father's love or is it because I am born this way? (laughs.. lady gaga).. What if you were still here? Am I still be in this situation? What if you were still here, Am I be in this dilemma? What if? what if?

Papa, I know you are already at the side of the Almighty. I know that you are already happy up there watching over me and to our family. I know you are already with mama enjoying the fruits of your hard work.

Papa, if you just here with me, I know you must be proud of me. I know you can brag me to your "Kainuman ug tuba" in our baranggay. You might be saying, this is my youngest good looking son who work in a University. This is my good looking son who will continue my race (laughs...) OR: This is my pretty son who loves a man and never neglected his family. This is my pretty son who is now happy with his langga.

Papa, though I am effeminate, but I did not dishonor our family. i did not make anything that would put our family in shame. In fact I am doing my best to bring grace to our race.

Papa, I am so thankful for the life you gave. I am so blessed that I was chosen by the good Lord to be your best son. I would not be here in my place if not because of YOU...

Papa happy father's day...

You are so loved,

Dodong Roy... 5:45 am...

Cancel

June 19, 2011, 4:37 am. bedroom at Pacific Tourist Inn, Cebu City. I lost you when I was 5 year old, I never experienced sleeping in your lap and listening to your song. I grew up without you and I wrangled life all by myself. I wasn't able to experienced your kisses and hugs. All I could remembe... Read more

SEBASTIAN › New article
8 years ago

The hot summer days in the Philippines might give you the reason to look for a very cool place where you and your family can enjoy. Experience the coolest pool of Canlaon City - The Inland Resort.

The Resort is located at Brgy Malaiba, approximately 20km from the City. Going up there is easy, upon arrival at the Bus Terminal, ask a motorcycle driver to take you to there (motorcycle is known as "habalhabal" in the locality which means back riding). it is just a 50 peso ride. Heading to Inland Resort, a cold breeze from the vegetable farm will charm you to explore the beauty of the place. When you reach the place, the "Bantay Boys" (Children who, in exchange of 10 peso, will take care of your vehicle while you are in the pool) will greet you with innocent smiles. Moving to the place, you need to pass by with 78 steps down, on the first steps, you can see the pool looming with blue fresh water surrounded with Free Cottages. when you step on the last stairs down, you will be excited to deep into the pool since this pool is so cool.

This resort offers 3 swimming pool with 1 kiddie pool. It gets it water supply from the spring located just beside the kiddie pool. The best thing about the water is that it is potable. So there is no worry about parasites, aside from being clean by the care taker, the pool has an overflowing water.

Another plus factor if your will visit this place, is the scenic view of the Mt Kanlaon. you will have a good glimpse on it because the resort is positioned just at the foot of the Mt. Kanlaon. 
The very cold water and the voices of the birds that surround the place lure you to get consider as one of your next destination.

The place is a good idea for friends and family who thinks going out is expensive. The Inland Resort of Canlaon City, Negros Oriental is free of charge. The Local government had developed it to invite people from different places to come and visit the place.

Come and experience the coolest summer in the Philippines. Come to Inland Resort of Canlaon City.

Cancel

The hot summer days in the Philippines might give you the reason to look for a very cool place where you and your family can enjoy. Experience the coolest pool of Canlaon City - The Inland Resort. The Resort is located at Brgy Malaiba, approximately 20km from the City. Going up there is easy, up... Read more

8 years

KimJohnson › Gorgeous place and fantastic pool

8 years

luluarte › wOWW Amazing :D

8 years