A Woman's Mind

(I wrote this article on November 4, 2008 and this was published in the Starlite Cafe, one of the websites where I used to published my poems and articles. Today, I am 56. )


I woke up this morning telling myself, there is a new day ahead. The grip in my heart got tighter and I gasped for more air.. a sighhh. I have to live no matter what; I grasped the morning's sign.

I have dreamed of waking up with you oneday, as the Westlife says ' it's waking up beside you, to watch the sunrise on your face, and to know that I can say I love you, at any given time or place...'

That was my beautiful dream but I have to wake up to reality. I am alone; alone in my thoughts, alone in my wishes.. alone in real.

Sometimes I'd been asking God why... yes, Why? God was silent but He replied in many ways. He is giving me the best in due time. This thought makes me smile always.

I am not perfect. I also committed mistakes but I need not blame myself always, I have to forgive myself as I also forgive those who stole my dreams; those who for sheer pleasure of proving themselves by letting others down would just come to my life to give me nightmares. I am still smiling as I think of them. ' The measure of a real man good man is not on how he ruined to prove his might; a real good man is someone who helps to build. He is someone who doesn't say 'Shut up!' instead he says, 'C'mon, speak...' and kisses a woman and she have no choice but to shut up..' (wink.. winkkkk)

My thoughts strayed along... I am no longer a girl. At forty six.. hmmm, I still dream. Life has been tough, yes but it made me who I am now. I am proud I am being me, I am so proud I am a WOMAN.